Process of Writing / Goddard College

j. k. cosmos
-Process – about language and spirit. How? Beginning at Goddard, the literal was the rule and I attended every workshop possible…had some angst on missing any of them and continued to read the handouts and run around from building to building with few minutes to spare. I did not speak. I did not volunteer to comment. I did not volunteer to read. I did not volunteer to ask a question. The days past and I also did not fully engage with my colleagues. I did not speak at the huge square table at meals. I listened. I did not nod my head in agreement with faculty or with other students. My recollection is that my initial days on campus were frightening; not in a way of horror, but in a way of being intimidated. Frightened was the theme of my first residency, as I had decided to come to Goddard only a few days prior to the residency, having accepted another MFA Program. I felt ambivalent as I had talked with the Director and staff at the other program and only one person at Goddard. I hadn’t quite centered myself at home first, prior to the drive from outside of Boston to Plainfield. I hadn’t quite made the time in my head to be fully cognizant of the decisions and the possibilities at Goddard.
One fifth term student spoke with me; she actually looked at me and the invisibility cleared up for a few moments. I appreciated her attempt to get to me. The time after the readings and very full schedule, I went to sit in my car and listened to James Taylor’s melodious voice, his soothing lyrics and songs. I sat in the car way too much and listened to JT and sat in the air conditioning. I called my oldest son, and he calmed me. He said to give it a chance. I knew that. Yes, I knew it intellectually. I could logically move to the place of being thankful that I had the opportunity to be a member of the Goddard community. But, the rest of me was uncomfortable and that is not usually the case for me. I usually am very able at being flexible with circumstances, people, social situations and those events where it just takes some thoughtfulness to be comfortable. I really am very okay in my own skin. That is why this feeling of not talking and just observing and listening was so very difficult.
The last evening of the residency, walking from Manor to the Admin Building, the Director of the Program was walking towards me with his dog, Darla. I wished I could walk slower or faster to miss any real contact with him. It wasn’t to be. As we approached each other, he said, ‘You are not here by chance, Jeanne. You are here for a reason.” He kept walking, as did I. If I responded to him, I cannot recall. It sounds like I’m coming back, I thought. I wish he’d told me that the first day and not the last.
Trust the process is the mantra. I thought about the conciseness of the theme on campus and the following morning returned home. Let the writing begin in earnst.

Sgt Crowley & Professor Gates - Tension & No Resolution

Despite the racist undertones, it seems to me as a former Assist.DA & Criminal Defense Atty, that this is a clear case of abuse of power by the police officer. It is not uncommon. The unique component is that it happened to a Harvard Professor. I hope that there is some movement towards reasonable de-escalation of the issues pertinent to police overstepping their authority. Sgt Crowley should have exited Prof.Gates home and gotten back in his cruiser. This is not a disputer where both men had equal power and authority. The report issued in this circumstance may be politically correct, however, it is very clear to me that the members of the panel are not criminal defense attys/prosecutors and have little understanding of the criminal justice system. They, unfortunately, missed a significant issue and did not step up to address the problem. By issuing a report giving both parties equal blame & responsibility, it is very clear that they were not able to get a clear perception of the problem in this case, nor do they 'get' the system and the average person's real danger of being arrested or abused when dealing with the police.